Two weeks back ole Jaron hit me up with a little, "oh by the way" challenge grenade. "Dude, you should try the treadmill six-minute mile." Simple. Yet deadly. It should have read... TO SIMULATE, JUMP OUT OF A SPEEDING CAR.
To put it into perspective, I typically finish my daily workouts with a 20 minute run holding a 8:30 minute mile. Heck, what's the big deal about shaving 2:30 minutes off the pace for a mile? It's the difference between light speed and ludicrous speed. Prepare ship for ludicrous speed. Fasten all seat belts, seal all
entrances and exits, close all shops in the mall, cancel the 3-ring circus,
secure all animals in the zoo... I pulled the plug on the challenge 120 seconds into mission after the treadmill went Plaid. There is very little issue with failure in my book. Constant fear of hypocrisy and fact checking ad nauseum for double entendres, provides a perfect back-drop for knowing when to hold'em, and when to fold'em. Personal note to Kenny Rodger... this coward of Clark County will not be attempting the "Treadmill Six Minute Mile" challenge again. I'm closing that window and never looking back. My legs are on fire, my head is fine, hold the phone, I'll be heading home in the slow lane today.
Bring on the rebound attempt of the "300 Spartan Workout". Coming to a local Gold's Gym February 15, 2013 (aka Heartbreaks Day... and since 1976, my burfday!)
So the current world record marathon time is 2:03.38. If my rudimentary math skills don't deceive me, that's just under 13 MPH. Jarvis was attempting 10 MPH...for one 26th as long. Even still, no small feat as Jarvis learned. I personally hate running, with a passion. Tough on your knees, keeps you in the wrong heart rate range for fat loss, unless your anaerobic threshold is pretty high, as it would be with a lifelong swimmer like ole JT. I don't even run to the liquor store. I subscribe to the "only two reasons to run" theory: from bears and cops. So naturally I won't be attempting this challenge any time soon either. 300, round 2 should be fun. Like getting a paper cut on your tongue licking an envelope is fun. Then forgetting about it and having some lemonade. The dog days of January have about passed. Gym attendance is normalizing. Sad, but resolutioners have mostly failed by now. If even one person, albeit in Serbia or Chechnya, has been inspired to begin an exercise and nutrition program because of this blog, I call that a win!
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