Blogpocalypse

This is the end,
my only friend,
the end...It hurts to set you free.
                                       - The Doors

"Blogpocalypse is nigh! 235! Square one! I am, apparently, a scarce few tenths of a pound from comprehensive trainer failure, and, from pulling the plug on this journalistic juggernaut that is limping along on life support." - Jaron, July 2015

"I will see this site torn to the ground after Thanksgiving, as it will no longer serve a purpose beyond nostalgia. If BLOG 3.0 is revived in 2015, I will not be a part of it! From one former fatboy to another, this time it sticks!" - Jaron, August 2012

                          

 

The West is the best, but this ride's gotta end before reaching the coast! Jaron is a man of his word, and I am a man of little loyalty to my weight plan. He set the point of no return, and as a good disciple to the pied piper of pain we are O-U-T! And so, Blogpocalypse occurred at 6:06 a.m. on Friday, February 19, 2016. The official scales read 235.2. The End... Over 100 post from August 2012 to present day, and nothing to show for it. The American Dream alludes.

 

Within the Hypocritical Oath of ODJ a passage reads; "Do as the ODJ says, not as the ODJ blatantly flaunts in your face." When Jaron gains weight, it is not acceptable to gain along side. This fat guy doesn't need sympathy from the herd; I need an unhealthy amount of fat shaming.

 

I have enjoyed documenting the past 40 months of weight loss, weight gain, and the occasional opine on the subcultures of gym life. Don't fret our loyal followers, we will be fine. Our word-smithing will never go fallow. We have been texting like twenty-something hipsters since the days of Startac numpadding. The QWERTY keyboard was but a glimmer in the eye of Blackberry when we were producing rapid fire twenty-first century Gonzo. And if that is not enough comfort for those who care; Jaron and I can now give more time and attention to the long rumored, but not yet titled sequel to Achieving ODJ.

In the inspiring words of Randy Dupree... Stay loose. Stay liquid. Laugh a lot. Stay nimble till you get the call from the mother ship.

Hypertrophy Horizontal Loading - Phase 2

This ain't cereal! Jaron does not permit soggy. As soon as my body gets comfortable... a more accurate statement; when my body no longer feels like a battlefield of pain points he drops a new set of craziness. Moss gets annoyed on a roll'n boulder.

 

As a child I would take little wax and rub it across an ant trail. Them little solider boys in the back get all scrambled. That is what gym-ruts experience when Jaron and I are on a religious "4 in 3" rotation. Four different work outs in a three day week. The Arian Nation delegates at our gym only subscribe to chest and arm work outs. And heaven forbid our Core & Shoulder day lands on a Monday. We use the bench press for roll ups because the weight bar allows for stability. You would've thought we set fire to the fabric of the universe. You fools might be our color, but you can't bring your sideshow act to the bench on Mondays!!! 

 

Horizontal loading 5 sets of 5 with :60 seconds of rest

Folllowed by :20 - :30 minutes of slow grind cardio

Chest & Triceps

Decline Press dumb bells – 55-65 lbs
Incline Press dumb bells – 55 lbs
Bosu pushups – military narrow hands 10 reps
Tricep extension – Hammer Strength 60 lbs

Legs

Single leg press – machine – 105 lbs
Smith machine sitting squat – 135-150 lbs
Pee Wee Herman Lunges dumb bells – 25 lbs
Donkey Calf – 165 lbs

Back & Biceps

Underhand pullups – body weight or machine assisted 70-55 lbs
Rows - seated overhand wide grip – 90-100 lbs
Preacher curls – machine – 60 lbs
Standing cable curls – rope with turnout – 80 lbs

Core & Shoulders

Military press – machine – 80 lbs
Revers Flys – machine – 115-135 lbs
Lateral raises – dumb bells – 20-27.5 lbs
Bench roll ups – bench press bar – 20 reps
Stability ball plank rollouts – 12 reps