"Middle age white guy problems, but a third world life ain't one."
If our readership has not figured out for themselves that Jaron and I do not take ourselves serious, let me clarify; "Jaron and I do not take ourselves serious!" This blog is meant to poke fun at fitness fads, our personal hypocrisy, Crossfit disciples, and anything we find down-right idiotic (vis-à-vis the entire product line of BeachBody, Jenny Craig, and body wraps to name a few.) In no way does this take away from Jaron's professional aptitude and extensive knowledge of the fitness industry. Nor does it take away from our years as NCAA Division I swimmers either. We are just abdicating people think for themselves, listen to your body, go to a professional and get off the unholy swill those snake oil salesmen are pushing on early morning infomercials.
I look forward to my daily gym visit, and not because I crave the endorphin rush, but because gyms are a cultured petri dish of Ponce de León descendants, unapologetic douche bags, and a full spectrum of seekers. All parties giving me inspiration to stay in the clichéd "moment," and to continue on with my work out program to see if the fertile land sprouts up an observation to pass along in this digital rag. Having Jaron as the inside man pulling back the curtain on the Great Oz we plan to spit out this dribble for a long time. So buy the ticket, take the ride.
I have many a friend who, in one way or another, are involved with Beach Body, It Works, and/or Crossfit, either as participants, or instructors/owners. And, yes, I disparage them to their faces! We seriously do not take ourselves too seriously, and we understand that a broken watch is right twice a day. So to each their own. My moral compass won't allow me to abdicate poorly designed, uncertified exercise, sarcasm aside. It just won't. Would any of you feel comfortable taking advice from a doctor or lawyer who gained their unaccredited license in a two day online course, courtesy of a nonproctored exam and no mandatory ongoing education?! Answer yes, sheep...I dare you. Gym stereotypes are that for a reason, they hold mustard. Don't think for a second I don't have nicknames for all of you idiosyncratic knuckle daggers and cardio queens. Only way to get through the day, sometimes. The Germans have a word that has no translation in English: schadenfreude. Look it up, if need be, but I take part daily, and would have it no other way. We may not set out to alienate readership on a weekly basis, but are comfortable with this inevitability. Exit stage left, if your weak constitution impels you.
ReplyDelete