Monday, Monday, so good to
me.
Monday morning, it was all
I hoped it would be.But Monday morning, Monday morning couldn't guarantee...
- The Mamas & the Papas
If the road to Hell is paved with good
intention, Monday is when more millage gets added to the highway.
Just look at my little world of snark; cult fad
diets, running, jumping on the health food bandwagon, dusting off gym
memberships, Crossfit, Orange Theory, breaking the sealed T25 DVD from
last Christmas, and or any combination of the above for super awesome
extra fast results. All launched on Mondays. Second only to the
annual spectacle of New Year's resolutions, starting a new
life on Mondays is steeped in good ole fashion American middle
class mediocrity. "Starting Monday..." roles off the tongue
with such shallow ease; rivaled only by slick politicians, Wall
Street executives, and 2:00a.m. infomercial pitchmen.
The largest population segment of our comic
reservoir spends all weekend proclamating about the converting power
of Mondays. I would speculate that Beach Body, Jillian Micheals, and the "lets frown upon real
workout" crew at Planet Fitness spend extra marketing dollars over
the weekend armed with mountains of data supporting Monday life-changers. We
are talking about cash cow levels of potential consumers. Who needs
the coveted 18-34 year old demographic... Give me a six-minute abs
commercial on prime time slots on the networks of E!, TLC and Bravo for 90 days and
I'll be the Warren Buffet of fitness.
I was once guilty of starting my new life on Mondays. It’s
the mental reset button to months if not years of doing the same thing day in
and day out. What amazes me, I believed that Monday morning had some mystical
bonding agent between my grandiose intentions to change and reality's cold
reality.
May your Mondays be all that your weekend self-proclaims
it will be!
